Perspective...and other weighty issues

We've all heard the ol' "muscle weighs more than fat" argument.  Usually, it's coming out of the mouth of someone who is overweight, and for whatever reason, this simple concept is misinterpreted time and time again.

So before I get into the main subject of my post, I'd like to try to clear the air.

1 POUND of anything weighs the same and 1 POUND of anything else.  Seriously.  1 pound of muscle weighs a pound, and so does a pound of fat.  The difference is in VOLUME.  1 pound of muscle takes up less space than 1 pound of fat, because muscle is more dense.  Get it together people, it's not a difficult concept!

Phew!

The reason I felt compelled to address this common misconception is that in the last 24 hours, I've had two very different conversations about my weight; one with my Mother, and one with a coworker, both of whom have just returned from their respective vacations.

I dropped my parents off at the airport a month ago, and they arrived back in Canada yesterday.  Aside from their lovely, dark tans (where did I miss out on THAT gene?), it was clear that they'd had a great vacation due to their weight gain.  I poked at my Mom about it, and she made a bunch of excuses about how "healthily" they ate, and how much walking they did...but I wasn't buying it.  In an obvious attempt at misdirection, my Mom pointed out that I'd lost weight.  Not true!  My weight this morning is a measly 0.6 pounds HIGHER than it was the day they left.

A week ago, one of my coworkers left for vacation.  He too was sporting a nice, deep tan, and a few extra pounds.  He looked at me at lunch today and said "you've gained about 5 pounds since I left, haven't you?" While most people would have smacked him, I know that his wife is very into fitness, so I took it as a compliment without hesitation.

So my Mom thinks I've lost weight, and that's a compliment, and my coworker thinks I've gained weight, and THAT's a compliment... and I took both of them as positives.  It's funny how perspective can bend our truth, isn't it?

Whether it's 5 pounds of fat, or 5 pounds of muscle, remember to love what you can, when you can!

Mandy
xo

It's not a too-mah (Arnold Classic 2013)

On March 2nd, I got to cross one of my 30-before-30 goals off of my list: I met a handful of my BAM girls!

I flew down to Columbus, Ohio to take in the Arnold Classic 2013 expo.  I was greeted at the airport by two of my favourite people whom I had never met in person, Jill and Shannon.  From the very first second, these girls were a RIOT!  Once we finally made our way out of the airport (which took about 30 minutes, even with "you can't miss it" directions), we got to the hotel and had our first ever slumber party.  Too many jokes to even begin to explain our evening here...

First thing Saturday morning, we were up and taking advantage of the hotel breakfast buffet - scrambled eggs and oatmeal for all - and then off to the Convention Centre for the main event.  Ok, so it wasn't really the main event, it was the expo, but for our purposes it was EVERYTHING - meeting the rest of our girls (Rachel, Cari & Megghan), getting some face time with our mutual idol, Jamie Eason, and really just taking in the whole experience.

Once we found our parking lot (Shannon and Jill are TERRIBLE with directions! lol), we said a quick hello to Rachel at the bodybuilding.com booth, but they were VERY busy, so we decided to do a tour after a quick hug.  We struggled to get around - it was insanely busy! - but eventually made it to the back of the convention hall, where some of the amateur competitions were going on.  WOW were these girls amazing!  First it was the amateur figure competitors... 

...and then the amateur bikini competitors.  WOW.  Some of these girls had far more muscle than I expected for bikini!

We rounded up the crew and got in line to meet Jamie Eason.  She's about 5 months pregnant, and totally adorable.  One of the girls had made an extra "Beauty and Muscle" shirt for Jamie, since she was the one who brought us all together in the first place.  She was so gracious and kind, and tried to take as much time with each of us as she could, despite the guys running the booth rushing everyone through (this girl is in demand!  Everyone wanted to see her!)  What an absolute pleasure!

The rest of the day was spent navigating the other booths at the expo.  I put on a clinic at the Fat Gripz booth (HA!  Deadlifted 205 without the Fat Gripz no problem, but forget it with them!  I need to get a set!)

Also got to meet the lovely Amanda Adams of Oh Yeah! and she complimented me on my hair.  Cari got a more generic autograph, but we figure that's because it was obvious that she had no idea who Amanda was. LOL.

The Vitamin Shoppe had a cool photo-op set up, so of course we got in on that action


And we did the same at the GNC booth!

We hit up North Market for some yummy lunch

And had Mexican for our 'family' dinner.

I caught a ride with the bb.com crew to an after party that night, and danced the night away at MegaBash, where I met the guys from PrOATein - go figure, I go to Ohio, and end up partying with people from Toronto!

A quick 20 minute nap, and I was off to the airport to head home.  It all went so quickly, and I wish I could have had more time with my girls!  We all agreed that next year, we're doing the Sunday - Saturday was INSANE, and there were way more freebies given out on Sunday according to Rachel who was there the whole time.   


I can't want to do it all again next year, and I know I'll see my girls again before that!

Mandy
xo

Ketchup (not just a sugar-filled, tomato-based condiment)

Once again, I’ve been a BAD blogger.  I’ve left you, my faithful (10) followers hanging without your fill of stories, anecdotes, updates and to-do lists for far too long.

 

Exciting things that have happened since we last hung out:

 

·         I spent the holidays in Orlando, Florida with a friend.  Totally opted out of the whole holiday thing in the traditional sense.  Christmas dinner was a Chicken & veggie pizza from Pizza Hut.  Seriously.  Then one day, we walked 7 miles in each direction just to get Ben & Jerry’s ice cream.  Uphill.  Both ways. (ok, maybe not that last part.  But 7 miles for real!)

·         My (first) 29th birthday!  Hilarious stories with our newest ‘single serving’ friends from Iowa, and my new imaginary husband.

·         A new workout program!  WOO!

·         Me, dating.  A LOT.

·         Me, getting exhausted with dating!  Lol

·         Setting my ex up with a dating blogger.  Yeah, that happened, and it was awesome.

·         The Superbowl – Go Ravens!

·         Valentine’s day…..xoxo

·         Made plans to go to the Arnold Sport Festival 2013 – and meet a handful of my BAM girls!

 

The holidays were great.  I spent December 23rd with my parents and opened gifts.  As always, they were incredibly generous…highlights include a new watch – solar powered, so I’ll never have to replace a battery (or stop wearing a watch because I’m too lazy to replace a battery) – a bottle brush (hallelujah! They finally get it!), and a collapsible funnel.  LOL  I love my family.  Hopped on  a plane early on the 24th, and spent the following 9 days in warmer weather than my family and friends.  No holiday decorations, no tree, no nothing.  Just my bikini, and nice long walks every day.  And Pizza Hut for Christmas dinner.

 

New Year’s Eve, we sat in the hot tub with a group of fun strangers until about 11:00pm when the pool closed, then raced to the room, got all prettied up, and went to the resort restaurant bar.  We met a couple of brothers from Iowa (Hi guys!), and sat at the bar with our drinks, exchanging stories.  At midnight, we threw napkins like confetti, then crashed a private party down the hall.  This big, Italian family was celebrating their Matriarch’s 70th birthday, so we were instantly friends, OBVIOUSLY. 

 

Once I was finally all pizza’d out and back on home turf, it was time to get dialed in for a new program.  I took my (admittedly intentionally slightly embarrassing) “Before” pictures, and signed up for a couple of challenges.  One was the www.bodybuilding.com $100k Transformation Challenge, and the other was the James Wilson 12 week challenge.  I purchased the training program from James, and have been following faithfully ever since.  It’s a big change from the way I typically work out, with a lot of circuit work and super-duper-sets with very short rest times, and full body focus rather than muscle group specific work each day of the week.  I’ve seen some significant muscle gains, and plan to spend the next 6 weeks leaning out little by little – to look awesome in my bridesmaid dress for my best friend’s wedding in Mexico in April!

 

With the New Year, and a new program came a new focus: dating.  Partly as a journey of self-discovery, partly because, well, who doesn’t want a partner in crime?  Yes, I had an online profile.  Yes, I met some STRAAAANGE characters.  I went on some really bad dates, some really good ones, met good guys, weird guys, and even not-so-good guys.  At one point, I was going on THREE OR MORE dates EVERY WEEKEND!  It quickly grew exhausting, and I’ve since narrowed things down to a more manageable number of really great guys.  I’m in the process of getting to know them better, and eventually will let my guard down and move onto relationships, but for now I’m comfortable where I am.  Just trying to be as aware of all of the feelings involved as I can.  The last thing I want to do is break hearts.

 

Speaking of breaking hearts, through the magic of facebook I came across a dating blog written by the roommate of a friend of a friend.  After reading the first couple of entries, I was hooked, and started following her blog via Twitter.  www.52FirstDates.ca is written by a girl who calls herself “La Blonde” and I’m fairly certain we were separated at birth.  So naturally, I set her up with my ex.  Yes, you read that correctly.  I set my ex up with a random stranger who blogs about her dating life, and her mission to go on a date per week for a year.  What could possibly go wrong?  (As it turns out, Trolls – who claim to be friends and former friends of mine/ours – ripping me apart in the comments is what could go wrong)  Check out dates 14, 15 and 16 with “the Z-man”  to see the hilarity.  Seriously though, I wish him well, and will be cheering for him (from afar) when he competes in his first fitness competition 3 weeks from now.

 

Superbowl happened.  The Ravens won.  There was nacho dip, and chicken wings.  Need I say more?

 

Valentines day was amazing for me.  Not for the reason that one would typically wax poetic either.  This Valentines day was celebrated with Kidney-shaped cards  - not hearts (FYI, Hallmark doesn’t make kidney shaped valentines).  One year ago, on February 14th, my Dad has his surgery to remove his cancer-riddled kidney.  A year later, he’s still cancer free, and happy and healthy.  It really brings VDay back to a positive sentiment for the cynic in me!

 

That pretty much brings me up to this week.  Yesterday, I booked my flight to Columbus, OHIO for the 2013 Arnold Sports Festival this weekend!  This is an event that I’ve been trying to get to for a few years now, but until this year haven’t been able to get it together.  I’m VERY excited to even be going, but the thrill is heightened even more by the fact that while I’m there, I’ll finally get to meet a handful of my BAM girls face to face, in person.  I don’t know that I can express how important these women have become to me over the past 15 or so months, and I’m going to hug their guts right out of them!!!  J

 

I PROMISE I will blog about the weekend’s events, give special shoutouts to my girls, and be ALLLLL over the Twitterverse with it.  If you’re not following me yet, please do so – it’ll be fun!

 

Above all else, remember to love what you can, when you can, and I’ll see you at the Arnold!

 

Xo

Mandy

 

The Holidays: Ho-Ho-Hopeless?

If you're like me, you try hard year round to make good choices when it comes to your body - whether it's food, workouts, or just general health, wellness and overall fitness.  AND THEN December rolls around (read: Holiday parties, excessive temptation from baked goods, additional pressure from peers, family and friends from team "oh-come-on-you-look-great-just-one-won't-kill-you", and the general stress and lack of time that comes with the season) and no matter how hard you try, it all seems to go out the window.  Next thing you know, you're making excuses about all of the weightloss contests that you're going to do starting in January, and don't want to give yourself a disadvantage by losing the extra pounds before the contest starts...seriously.  I know you do it. 

FEAR NOT, dear friends!

When I first made the decision that I could be a better version of myself a few years ago, I went to a gym, and got a "Nutritionist".  When it occurred to me that she wasn't even remotely qualified to be giving me diet advice, I met a REAL Nutritionist: Kyle Byron (I'll count the letters that come after his name and add them in later - he's a real deal fitness nerd, and easy on the eyes too!).  This guy walks the walk, talks the talk, and frankly, you could proudly take him home to Mom any day of the week!

I got Kyle's most recent newsletter in my e-mail inbox the other day, and asked him if I could share it with everyone, so I'll stop my rambling and share with you Kyle Byron's "HOLIDAY FITNESS TIPS"

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Holiday Fitness Tips

It's a tough time of year for trying to stay fit and healthy. Pick a few of these tips and try something new this year. I've put the most-important tips at the top of the list. 1. Stay engaged mentally. Whether that means daily goal-setting, being in touch with your coach or simply using appetite awareness - stay present! Remember that emotion drives our behaviour, so if you need to break a pattern, try to understand the emotional reward of negative behaviours and their emotional negative results too. 2. Eat the treats you love in moderation. AVOID run-of-the-mill treats that sit idly hither and yon. They aren't worth it. Bring healthy food to social events to give yourself more chances of success. 3. Remember that training before treat meals can minimize the damage of extra calories and sugar. The harder and longer you train, the more calories you're going to deflect. If you can't get to a gym try this: Home Workout: After a warm up, triple-set pushups, side planks and split squats or wall-sits. Rest for 30-120 seconds after each triplet and repeat 3-6 times. Pat yourself on the back. While you stretch think positive thoughts! 4. Watch your use of language. If you continue to lament, "The holidays always set me back," guess what Luke Skywalker, you will fulfill that destiny! Instead say, "The holidays are historically a challenge but I am more into fitness than ever - I will do better this year and reward myself for the improvement. Yay me!" If that sounds corny, just keep in mind the most successful people in the world think positively. 5. Meatloaf had it right when he said, "Two outta three ain't bad." If you eat a perfect breakfast and lunch, and your dinner is a bit off (say, you have extra carbs and a small desert), you can easily out-train those calories with some shopping and a 10 minutes of push ups. Bonus points if said activity comes before the treat meal. (In a normal week however, we strive for "4.5 outta 5" but I have no song reference). 6. Pull out of tail-spins. Dec 24-26 is only three days. Don't wait until Jan 3 to get your butt in gear. Get social support or contact me! 7. Don’t pause your coach! If you need them in normal life, how can you succeed without them during the hardest time of year? 8. Brush your teeth after feedings and you'll be less likely to graze again for a while.

Being the "Healthy Person" at a Party One of my clients said once, "It's easy for you (Kyle) to bring a salad to a party because you're a Nutritionist; people expect it. When I do it, I get made fun of all night." This piece will give you some tips on managing social situations that can amplify an already-touchy subject - eating. So you're invited to a cocktail party and your goal is to have one small treat. To control the environment, you bring a tray of veggies and organic meats skewers (healthy). Upon producing the food, at least one person says, "Look! The 'Healthy Person' brought diet food! Ha ha ha." Defusing comeback: "Oh, is this healthy? I just like this stuff." Then you will be persuaded to alter your life choices, "Live a little, it's Christmas," or my fav, "You know, it's not healthy to be restrictive all the time." Defusing comeback: "I will have some treats shortly." What I really want to say: "It's under control. My non-compliant meals are planned in advance to hit a range of 80-90% with at least two non-compliant meals coming after exercise." Later in the evening, a few guests will come to you and say, "Thank you for bringing the healthy food!" Add these people to your social network. Eventually, after considering many options, you decide to try a cupcake. You didn't realize it until this moment, but you have been under surveillance. Someone cries, "Look! Mr. Healthy is eating a treat!!!!" Defusing comeback: "Of course I am. Healthy eating means occasional treats." What I really want to say: "What I eat is my business. Please stop making a public display of my food choices. I always planned on eating a treat. I am not caving to social pressure." And it can get much uglier... Usually it's just some light jesting, but once I was called a "fag" for bringing salad to a bachelor party (by two guys, not my friends). I did not handle this well. Let's just say I offered them a free martial arts demo and they declined. But you can't just put up your dukes every time someone gets in your grill. I have a client who is under constant scrutiny from her work colleauges. I've coached her into politely setting some boundaries like, "Thank you for your concern. I'm seeing a nutritionist and my doctor, and everything is under control." Some folks won't lash out, they'll become insecure and self-deprecate. Kinda awkward. But I catch myself feeling this way around the fitness models I know (I'm not as fit). The point is... If you are reading this, you are either fit or trying to get fit. You are in the minority. Healthy eating or having recently changed your body shape, is going to draw attention. Be prepared and stay calm. Don't engage or explain.

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"Oh, this is healthy?" haha I love it!

If you are left wanting more of Kyle's writing, let me know and I'll hook you up with his newsletter.  If you're looking for a nutritionist to call your own, and can find your way to the uber cool King West area in Toronto, you can find him at 700 King West, or e-mail him directly at

kyle@kylebyronnutrition.com

And don't forget:  Love what you can, when you can!

Mandy
xo

Car Crash Nightmares

A week ago today, I was making the three hour drive back up North from Toronto to the small town where I'm currently working and living Monday through Friday.  After following a salt truck for nearly 30 minutes (so frustrating!), I finally got to turn onto a different route... I was barely through the intersection when I felt my tires slipping out from under my control.  I said out loud "I'm going to get in an accident" and took my foot off of the gas.  All I could think was to steer WITH the direction that the ice was taking me, and hold on tight.  I spun toward the opposite shoulder, and suddenly felt my car rolling into the ditch.  I don't really have a clear image of what I SAW, but vividly remember rolling.  When we came to a stop, my driver's side was on the ground.  I don't remember removing my seatbelt, but after I did, I had my feet in the grass, out through where the driver's side window used to be.  My dog had been sitting in the passenger's seat, in her harness seatbelt; now, she was upright, hanging above my head!

Amazingly, both my dog and I walked away from the accident without so much as a bruise.  My car is written off (the frame is twisted from rolling), but we are ok!  I can't help but think that someone was looking after us that day.  I had a stiff back for a couple of days after the fact, but the worst part of the aftermath has been the nightmares.  I haven't slept well all week because as soon as I fall asleep my mind is spinning like I'm back in the accident again.  If you think about it though, that's a small price to pay compared to what it could have been!

This year has been a tough one, but I have survived it and relatively unscathed.  After the accident, as cliche as it sounds, I feel like I have a new perspective - things have been tough, but depending on how you look at it, I've been either terribly unlucky, or incredibly fortunate.  It makes me think that I have a lot to look forward to in the coming year, and I am going to make the best of it!

Love what you can, when you can!

Mandy
xo

30 before 30

Below is a working list, that hopefully with result in 30 experiences that I will have over the next year, leading up to my 30th birthday.  These are experiences that I hope will help me to embrace change and grow emotionally and mentally and physically, instead of accomplishments that will define me.  Please feel free to add your suggestions in the comments below, and let me know if there are any experiences on the list that you would like to be involved in! 

1. Learn a new language
2. Finish the painting that I started in 2008
3. Volunteer
4. Compete in a fitness competition
5. Go skydiving
6. Get a professional facial (in all of the time I've spent in the salon, I've never had one!)
7. Be a part of the happiest day of someone's life (I'm cheating - I get to be a part of my best friend's wedding)
8. Meet at least some of the BAM girls
9. x
10. x
11. x
12. x
13. x
14. x
15. x
16. x
17. x
18. x
19. x
20. x
21. x
22. x
23. x
24. x
25. x
26. x
27. x
28. x
29. x
30. Spend my 30th birthday under the Eiffel Tower

2012: The End

As the world around us braces for the end of times, I AM READY.

2012 has been a real year of ups and downs for me (though it truly seems like more downs), both personally and professionally, and I'm embracing the fresh start that comes with a new year - whether it's here on this mortal Earth, or somewhere else, depending on whether the world comes to an end in the next couple of weeks.  So I say, bring it on!

Get out your tissue box:

In February, my dog ate protein squares that I had baked using Xylitol - which can be deadly for dogs - and spent 24 hours in the animal hospital on an IV to save her from hypoglycemia and irreparable liver damage (thankfully, she was ok, and recovered fully).  While she was in the hospital, I got a call from my parents, telling me that my Dad had kidney cancer, and would be going in for surgery ten days later (he also recovered fully, and is now involved in a drug trial).  I missed my period that month, which has never happened to me before, and after MANY home pregnancy tests and then a trip to the doc for bloodwork, it was determined that it was due to stress.  I had myself so convinced that I was pregnant that part of me was disappointed when I wasn't, if I'm being completely honest. 

By the end of March, I was laid off from my job.  My boyfriend had his ACL surgery in April, so the timing wasn't terrible and I could look after him.  I tried to approach the layoff with a positive attitude; truth be told, I really didn't like that job!  Sooner than expected though, the novelty wore off.  I was applying for jobs by the hundreds, and getting nothing but rejection e-mails.  My boyfriend and I were now doing our own separate workouts in the gym, instead of spending that quality time together like we had from the very start of our relationship. 

In May, I tried out for the Toronto Triumph, the Lingerie Football team, and made the team.  Then, I broke my wrist in training camp, 3 weeks before our home opener in September!  That made my training difficult, and put my dreams of an October fitness competition on hold.  Another roadblock!

My boyfriend started a new job, which was a really great opportunity, and he seemed genuinely excited about going to work, which filled me with happiness for him and hope that I could find the same for myself.  When a job finally did come along, it was out of town - 3 hours away, and in my little hometown - certainly another hurdle, but it was a really positive opportunity for me, and since it was only a contract, it didn't mean long term.  Besides, we'd see eachother on weekends!

I started my new job August 29th, and on October 6th, my boyfriend broke up with me.  I thought he'd been acting strangely because he was going to propose - I'd even gone so far as to look for the ring! - and he was unhappy, and tells me he had been for a long time.  Needless to say, I was, and AM heartbroken.  To add insult to injury, he continued to live in our home (MY house) in the city for another month while he looked for a new place, since I was only there on weekends.  It was like we broke up every weekend for a month.

After the breakup, I did something that I never in a million years would have thought that I would do: I drank.  Daily.  For more than a month.

I have had my head and my heart set on this "30 year plan" of mine for so long that I grieved all the way to the bottom of the bottle and then some.  No longer was 'married with a baby on the way' a possibility by 30.  It didn't matter that I have owned a home since I was 25, or that I have a promising career and make good money.  My family, friends and my dog still loved me.  The man that I loved no longer loved me.  It was Earth-shattering.

I stopped working out, I stopped eating right.  I generally stopped caring for myself emotionally and physically.  Even in the moments that I thought to myself "you deserve better than this" or "just go to the gym - you'll feel better", I didn't.  I was having a permanent pity-party for one.

\End sob story.

So here I sit, December 4th, 2012, less than a month from my 29th birthday.  I'm in my apartment - my home away from home, I guess - and it's time to redefine myself, and prepare to enter my 30th year of life with a clean slate (while I still have a healthy liver).

Rather than a 30 year plan, my hope is to make a "30 before 30" list.  Instead of a list of things I want to accomplish by my 30th birthday, knowing that I will be devastated if I haven't accomplished them, the hope is to list 30 EXPERIENCES that I can have in the next year.  Though the list isn't yet complete, it's quite varied; those who know me well might not expect some of them.  I hope that my friends and supporters can help me add to the list, and maybe even complete some of the items.

It's time for me to stop feeling sorry for the life that I'm not leading, and embrace the one that I am.  I am a firm believer that things happen for a reason.  Even though I don't understand those reasons, I know deep down that this is the path I'm supposed to be on.

Please cheer me on.  Stand behind me.  Better yet, stand beside me. 

I will follow this post with my 30 before 30 list.  If you have suggestions, PLEASE share them in the comments, so that I can add to my list.  Remember: these are experiences to help me grow in some way, not accomplishments that will define me.  If there is an experience that you want to be a part of, let me know!  We'll try to make it happen.

Never forget:  Love what you can, when you can.  And when you can't, let your loved ones help!

xo
Mandy